potpimp
Sector 5 Moderator
I went by my friends house who I always smoked with. On this particular night, Clay had a date, very unusual for him. I had a big fat joint of Jamaican week all rolled up and ready to fire up. He was getting ready to go on his date so I needed somewhere else to go. I decided to go to the library after I went for a ride in the country to get toasted.
I smoked about half of the joint and headed for the library while still able to drive. I had put the roach down and had two pieces of grape bubblegum in my mouth. My mouth was so dry I could hardly chew.
I pulled into the parking lot and into a space on the side of the building, facing a blank brick wall. I sat there for what seemed like a minute or so but couldn't have been more than a few seconds. I was wondering "Where the hell am I and why am I parked here?"
Suddenly the flashing lights of a police car directly behind me, no more than six feet away and blocking me in scared me shitless. I grabbed the roach with my trembling fingers and stuffed it into my mouth and chewed and tried my best to swallow. The shitty taste of the burnt roach, the paper and the sweetness of the bubblegum mixed together in my mouth as my heart felt like it would beat out of my chest. The cops were suddenly at my window.
One of the cops asked to see my drivers license. All I could think about was getting the huge mass of pot laced grape bubblegum down my parched, dry throat. It would not budge, no matter how hard I swallowed. The air around me was filled with the stench of wet, burnt marijuana; I just knew the cops smelled it. I fumbled for my wallet only to face a terrifying thought "What the fuck did he ask for? Did he ask for money?" Fortunately I had sense enough to know that he did not ask me for money! I thought to myself "Just look thru your wallet and see if something rings a bell." I flipped thru and saw my drivers license. What a relief!
I pulled out my drivers license and handed it to the ossifer. He looked at it and said "Mr. Natural (name changed to protect the innocent), did you know your tail lights are out?" I could not believe it; here I was, sitting in my van, chewing but unable to swallow a big wad of reeking pot laced grape bubblegum only to find out the cop was concerned about my tail lights being out.
It was all I could do to keep from getting out of the van and doing a happy dance right there. I kept my composure and tried to act as concerned and shocked as I could muster. I seemed to pull it off and promised to get it fixed immediately if not sooner. They were fine with that and told me to "Just get it fixed tommorrow, there is nowhere to get it fixed tonight."
The ossifer gave me my drivers license back and walked back to their car, none the wiser and I breathed a deep sigh of relief. ...then I spit out the damn bubblegum!
I smoked about half of the joint and headed for the library while still able to drive. I had put the roach down and had two pieces of grape bubblegum in my mouth. My mouth was so dry I could hardly chew.
I pulled into the parking lot and into a space on the side of the building, facing a blank brick wall. I sat there for what seemed like a minute or so but couldn't have been more than a few seconds. I was wondering "Where the hell am I and why am I parked here?"
Suddenly the flashing lights of a police car directly behind me, no more than six feet away and blocking me in scared me shitless. I grabbed the roach with my trembling fingers and stuffed it into my mouth and chewed and tried my best to swallow. The shitty taste of the burnt roach, the paper and the sweetness of the bubblegum mixed together in my mouth as my heart felt like it would beat out of my chest. The cops were suddenly at my window.
One of the cops asked to see my drivers license. All I could think about was getting the huge mass of pot laced grape bubblegum down my parched, dry throat. It would not budge, no matter how hard I swallowed. The air around me was filled with the stench of wet, burnt marijuana; I just knew the cops smelled it. I fumbled for my wallet only to face a terrifying thought "What the fuck did he ask for? Did he ask for money?" Fortunately I had sense enough to know that he did not ask me for money! I thought to myself "Just look thru your wallet and see if something rings a bell." I flipped thru and saw my drivers license. What a relief!
I pulled out my drivers license and handed it to the ossifer. He looked at it and said "Mr. Natural (name changed to protect the innocent), did you know your tail lights are out?" I could not believe it; here I was, sitting in my van, chewing but unable to swallow a big wad of reeking pot laced grape bubblegum only to find out the cop was concerned about my tail lights being out.
It was all I could do to keep from getting out of the van and doing a happy dance right there. I kept my composure and tried to act as concerned and shocked as I could muster. I seemed to pull it off and promised to get it fixed immediately if not sooner. They were fine with that and told me to "Just get it fixed tommorrow, there is nowhere to get it fixed tonight."
The ossifer gave me my drivers license back and walked back to their car, none the wiser and I breathed a deep sigh of relief. ...then I spit out the damn bubblegum!
