A friend of mine actually has a spoon that looks kinda like a dick and balls. It's a fairly big piece, too. I usually tell people to shut up and suck the dick.
I thought about taking offense to that. Then I remembered that you've never had a man, so I don't really give a fuck. Keep flapping your trap, whale bitch.
Btw, men look better with longish hair... I'd know, I am one.