Don't Fly with Vaporizers

Don't Fly with the Volcano

By T.A. Sedlak (Author of Anarcho Grow)

A few days after Christmas, I had to head to New York from Madison, WI to visit my girlfriend’s family. I recently had a sinus infection, so the Volcano was essential. I’m one of those stoners who’s virtually made a total switch from smoking to vaporizing, anyway. Hell, there’s a Volcano hidden on the cover of my book, Anarcho Grow.

I’m no dummy, either. I soaked the machine’s pieces in alcohol before leaving, the press and bag attachments. All spotless. As I waited for my bag to pass through the conveyor belt along with my jacket and shoes, I had no fear. However, I wasn’t surprised when a TSA worker said, “Let’s send it through again. Get another picture.”

They’ll take it out. I’ll explain that it’s an herb vaporizer and be on my way, I thought.

Wrong. They knew what it was, or had an idea, and searched my bag thoroughly for pot, hoping they could bring a charge. The process was taking long enough that I took a seat nearby. Twenty minutes passed before the TSA worker approached and told me the sheriff had been called. He said something quickly about paraphernalia. Something else I couldn’t make out.

“What?” I asked.

Again, he spoke quickly.

“What?”

“Nitro glycerin. It tested positive for it.”

“You’re joking?” I said.

“I never joke about my job,” he said sternly.

I waited uneasily for another twenty minutes before the sheriff arrived. The TSA employee allowed me to pack the rest of the things in my bag while the Volcano and its accoutrements were set aside. Eventually, a short chubby man wearing a crew cut and mustache over oily skin showed. He looked plucked from a stock comedy flick.

“What’s this machine?” he asked.

“A vaporizer.”

“What do you use with it?”

“Herbs, chamomile, echinacea…”

“What?” he said.

“Chamomile and Echinacea.”

“Tea?”

“The herbs can be used for tea, yes.”

He opened my grinder and inspected it. “Pretty clean,” he said. He looked at me. “You got some I.D.”

I handed him my license.

“You can take a seat over there,” he said, pointing to the chair I’d come to know.

I glanced at the clock. My plane was to board in eighteen minutes.
Fifteen minutes passed before he returned. He first spoke with a TSA agent. I heard the words “no priors,” and wondered if they’d illegally steal my machine.

The cop approached with the Volcano, its attachments, and my I.D. in a gray plastic bin. “Here,” he said.

“I’m free to go?”

“Yeah, where are you going?” he said.

“New York.”

“Visiting friends there?”

“Something like that.”

I’d been harassed by rogues who could legally do nothing. One man had even made a false claim that my luggage tested positive for explosives. All to try to bring a pot charge on me. Though it’s within one’s rights to travel with a clean Volcano, you may want to forgo it to avoid the hassle. TSA employees are after pot heads just as much terrorists. Maybe even more so.

The TSA is a bunch of liberty snuffing , freedom eroding, know nothings.


Of course they are after potheads and anything else they can find. The chances of a single person in the TSA finding and thwarting a "Real" terrorist is probably 1 in 6 billion. Their job is unsatisfying and boring, can you imagine all the crap you have to do, all the underwear you have to inspect all the people you have to piss off. No job satisfaction at all, you know your never going to catch a real terrorist so you do the next best thing, you try to catch everyone else.


FWIW. When you travel, travel with a starter pistol. it must be declared as a weapon and then that checked piece of luggage goes through much more scrutiny as far as being tracked and NOT LOST. Plus the luggage is locked and sealed. You don't need any kind of license to carry a starter pistol, you can buy them at the sporting goods stores . This will ensure your luggage stays intact and unmolested. Just go to the counter and tell them you have a weapon to declare and they will give you a card to fill out, wala your luggage now goes straight to the plane while under the direct supervision of someone. Works great for laptops, cameras etc etc etc. the luggage is locked, no one can open it, they don't give a shit whats inside. So if you want your luggage and its contents to not get opened, not get stolen and not get lost. put a starter pistol in there and have it declared, it works awesome

I would never expect to fly with a vaporizor. If I had to have it I'd ship it ahead then ship it back home.

Illegal Smile said:

I would never expect to fly with a vaporizor. If I had to have it I'd ship it ahead then ship it back home.

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As long as its clean its totally legal to carry.

I love to make time to fuck with those guys.

I'll bet the Postal inspectors were so happy when the TSA came into being. Now they aren't the Barney Fifes of federal law enforcement anymore.

it sound like it was a complete buzz kill and a bad seen man

Well my seeds never showed up. so they still like to enforce. lol

Thanks for the replies, peeps.

Here's an update:

In returning home I decided to remove the Volcano from my bag and place it in its own tray with its accoutrements, like people have to do with laptops. That way the TSA workers at least wouldn't search through my whole hiking pack. Besides them dropping it on the floor, there were no problems. They just tested it for explosives (took less than a minute) and had me on my way. Thanks La Guardia TSA crew.

Bringing legal paraphernalia is a good exercise of freedoms but can be one hell of hassle.