just a little about how tonight went.

So today... well 4 hours ago at 2am.. i was at a local club with a few friends.. it was a tuesday night and a friend of mine had the day off work on wed so we decided to get shameless.

So we're at this club.. and remembering that it's 2am on a tuesday night.. as expeccted the lcub is dead... just a bunch of guys expectiun the same as us lol.

Regardless so around half an hour later they close the doors.. so if you step out you gotta leave.. which means no cigarettes.. and when im drinkin.. they both just go togehter .. a lot.

so this bouncer standin at the door goes you cant step out.. and im like.. seroiusly bro please just its one cigarette.. i'll have a friend let me in so you dont even have to worry about it... and he goes.. no... so im like whatever man.

I walk away, and 10 mins later i see he lets this blonde bombshell out for a cigarette.. and im like.. wtf?...so i go back.. (yeah i really did want a cigarette) and tell the bouncer.. im like.. cmon bro i just saw you let em out, im just askin you for one cigarette.. and he goes.. no... those people out there are leavin.. so im like.. okay.. my bad.. i guess.

at this point it was just more about the fairness of bein let out rather than the cigarette.. which i was honestly too drunk to think about

and as i expected they obviously all came back in.. and he continiued to stand there and smile.. so a few minutes later he lets someone else out.. n im like.. wtf man.. so i walk up once again... (i know im shameless) and im like... dude honeslty?.. like... one cigarette?. and he goes.. no.. and the next time you ask me i'm gonna punch you in the face.. i dont care about cops or anyone.. ill do it... so im still standin there.. at this point all the cranberry vodkas and pornstar shots had started to get to me... and it didnt occur to me that this big guy might just knock me out not givin a fuck..

so i'm like.. bro.. i'm asking nicely!.. and i swear to god.. if there is one.. that i was being as nice as i could fuckin imagine... and he goes... you're fuckin annoyin.. and grabs me by the colllar and kicks me out.

So i'm like k... a few minutes later my boy walks up to the bouncer and goes.. wtf?... whyd he get kicked out.. and the bouncer starts screamin at him n shit.. this guy was honestly pmsin.. its ridiculous the attitude.. well regardless a few minutes after screamin he kicks my boy out too... so i'm standing outside smokin a cigarette finally... and explainin to my friend what happened... this other bouncer outside goes.. you're annoyin.. shut the fuck up.. i'm like whatever.

at this point a cop pulls up and goes is there a problem here.. and im like.. no its all good.. no worries... he drives away.

So this is the point of the night which i regret most and wish now that i never said, regardless of however whoever may treat me.

So i look at the same bouncer whos standin behind the glass dooor in the club.. smilin at me... and i'm llike... what a nigger.. to my friend... and at that point it didnt occur to me what i had said... and honestly we were all so smashed that noone really th0ought twice about what i said..... so the black bouncer didnt really hear me at that point, but his friend outside did... and grabs me and moves me off the property.. and says.. why dont you call him a nigger to his face.. so i was like.. fuck you man... and outta nowhere the black bouncer grabs me and goes crazy.. shakin me and pushin me n shit.. didnt really do anythin.. but i knew he would if he could... and he was just really pissed but at that point a cop showed up.. same one.. and just sorted shit out.

Well i'm just gonna atttempt to make this a little shorter than it has to be.. and say.. regardless of how unfair that guy was to me..a nd whhatever he may have said or done to me... i should have never..ever.. called him a nigger, what does that say about me?... im that last fuckin person on the planet to be racist honestly.. i'm a brown guy.. and honestly i fuckin love everyone regardless of what you look like or are... and i am sittin here confused outta my fuckin mind as to why i called that man a nigger... like i could have fuckin cussed out his mom his family.. his looks..anythin.. but i chose to call him a nigger... i donno what to say about myself.. its shameless honestly... but i regret it... and feel sorry that i said that to him of all things, a very low thing for me to do... to stoop so low to get back at someone... its ridiculous.

and i just wanted to take this post out to apologise to anyone that i may have offended in that sense... im not a racist.. can't explain why... but i'll definitely think twice before i say that again.

thanks for readin, just wanted to take a load off my chest, and i knew if theres one place i could do it freelly.. would be here.

thanks for readin,

You need to quit smoking dude!

dude its simple when your inebriated your brains works on a slower level, the guys pissed you off so you in your drunk state choose the first thing that pops into your mind, the guys black you drop the N bomb.

when it comes down to it your not some hillbilly that believes they should all still be slaves picking cotton. if people took everything i say when im drunk as gospel id have no friends.

draw a line and move on man

Well you realized your mistake, good for you.

yeah, i definitely realize my mistake, but i guess i just needed to either type it or say it to someone.. and at 6am the only right thing that came to mind was rollitup

I appreciate the comments.

People speak the truth when they are drunk....Maybe you have some racist in you?

Boneman said:

People speak the truth when they are drunk....Maybe you have some racist in you?

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You know what, i strongly agree with that statement, the fact that people will say what is truly on their mind when they're drunk and that it reveals you to yourself.

But at the same time, i'll argue that i have never in my life made a racist comment against anyone, like... honestly if i wished to, i couldn't see someone in a racial sense.. just not me man.

I'd admit it if it was me... but then again it is in that fear that i made this post, just to hear what people think.

there's a little bit of racist in everyone. i don't believe that any race in the world looks at another race and doesn't see them as different, which in effect is racism. theres a difference between that and going out and bashing an indian because hes brown.

Boneman said:

You need to quit smoking dude!

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I strongly agree with you here too lol, but the thing is... this past few months i've been cutting down my weed consumption to none... nothing.. zero... just because at a point in my life i started to realize that it was holding me back... and i would never get on a marijuana forum and insult the herb lol.. so let me make myself clear when i say i quit because i couldn't find my line.. my limit.. i was never able to keep it in moderation, though i still smoke on occasion, but until i feel lifes under control i'm stickin to it lol..so it's pretty hard and i've switched to smoking cigarettes until i can leave this too.. i know call it weak lol but i'ts the most convenient option i saw.

Don Gin and Ton said:

there's a little bit of racist in everyone. i don't believe that any race in the world looks at another race and doesn't see them as different, which in effect is racism. theres a difference between that and going out and bashing an indian because hes brown.

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I agree... i've thought about it before..and it is not in human nature to react completely normally when you see somethin different.. like regardless of your intentions, you just tend to be a little different involuntarily.. regardless that doesn't justify being racist.

greenleaftoker said:

I agree... i've thought about it before..and it is not in human nature to react completely normally when you see somethin different.. like regardless of your intentions, you just tend to be a little different involuntarily.. regardless that doesn't justify being racist.

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absolutely man! doesn't justify it one bit. I'm not proud of it but in some ways i am racist, by default. i will try and get on with any individual i meet on a personal basis regardless if their from fu manchu of tinbucktoo but i dislike some races/ religions, i am prejudiced. one of my many failings.

i live in a multicultural city where the races dont mix or even speak with each other. i treat others as i would have them treat me but unfortunately other races are just as racist if not more than my own. its a funny world.

Don Gin and Ton said:

absolutely man! doesn't justify it one bit. I'm not proud of it but in some ways i am racist, by default. i will try and get on with any individual i meet on a personal basis regardless if their from fu manchu of tinbucktoo but i dislike some races/ religions, i am prejudiced. one of my many failings.

i live in a multicultural city where the races dont mix or even speak with each other. i treat others as i would have them treat me but unfortunately other races are just as racist if not more than my own. its a funny world.

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Lol yeah man.. thats very true, sounds like it came from the heart lol.

It's sad how racist our world is otherwise, but i always believe that you deserve the same level of respect that you are givin by an individual, and hence also not to prioritize someone in your life when you're just an option to them... so yeah a few things that go together.

lol yeah i was alittle unsure about posting it tbh, but hell its the truth.

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happy growin greanleaf!

Don Gin and Ton said:

lol yeah i was alittle unsure about posting it tbh, but hell its the truth.

[youtube]WusHDsK1yBQ&hl=en&fs=1&"[/youtube]

happy growin greanleaf!

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Thanks man... gotta love smash mouth

It's ok dude! Listen to it all the way through.

[youtube]xbwNSNLPIfw[/youtube]