Life blows. Honest advice needed.

BygonEra

Well-Known Member
Sound like your obsessed with appearance, yours and others, believe it or not there are people who see beyond that;)
I honestly appreciate this feedback.... it makes me feel better. lol. I've always felt men are FAR more obsessed with appearance. Most of my friends are guys though, and based on feedback from them I've got a pretty good reason for feeling this way. Maybe I just surround myself with shitty people.

But you can't say most people don't form an immediate assumption based on looks alone before meeting someone. What else do you have to form an opinion? Obviously that can CHANGE after meeting someone... but I hear guys judge their friends ALL the time for talking to some less-than-ideal chick at the bar. Or talk shit about some hot girl who come to find out has a weird lookin downstairs. Guys suck. If I waited until I got in bed with a guy for him to find out my hair isn't real, you KNOW he'd tell all of his friends and they'd have a good laugh about it. It's just what people do.
 

ZaraBeth420

Well-Known Member
either take care of the dude your with...or dump him and move on...don't drag on a good dude willing to put up with your problem.
Yes, @BygonEra , chuck makes a good point.

The hair thing has made you unfairly feel terribly unattractive. And yet your boyfriend still loves you and thinks your beautiful. While I agree with chuck that you should kindly cut him loose (based upon the way you feel about him), you may find later on that you had a real gem in him.
 

Yessica...

Well-Known Member
I honestly appreciate this feedback.... it makes me feel better. lol. I've always felt men are FAR more obsessed with appearance. Most of my friends are guys though, and based on feedback from them I've got a pretty good reason for feeling this way. Maybe I just surround myself with shitty people.

But you can't say most people don't form an immediate assumption based on looks alone before meeting someone. What else do you have to form an opinion? Obviously that can CHANGE after meeting someone... but I hear guys judge their friends ALL the time for talking to some less-than-ideal chick at the bar. Or talk shit about some hot girl who come to find out has a weird lookin downstairs. Guys suck. If I waited until I got in bed with a guy for him to find out my hair isn't real, you KNOW he'd tell all of his friends and they'd have a good laugh about it. It's just what people do.
It helps if you are just born with a really nice Vagina.

Score! Haha
 

caveman117

Well-Known Member
I was dating a girl for a while that only wore wigs. she had died her hair so much when she was younger that it destroyed her hair so she kept it bald and wore different wigs all the time. I still thought she was attractive and it didnt really seem like she let it get to her at all, but shed been doing it a long time by the time I met her.
 

BygonEra

Well-Known Member
Yes, @BygonEra , chuck makes a good point.

The hair thing has made you unfairly feel terribly unattractive. And yet your boyfriend still loves you and thinks your beautiful. While I agree with chuck that you should kindly cut him loose (based upon the way you feel about him), you may find later on that you had a real gem in him.
This is a big issue I'm having. I'm afraid if I leave him, I'll be fucking myself over. But I'm afraid if I marry him, I'll be miserable. It's some stupid shit I need to figure out soon. If he got a decent job and I was no longer supporting him, I'd feel a million times better. And marriage would be a definite conversation topic.
 

Yessica...

Well-Known Member
This is a big issue I'm having. I'm afraid if I leave him, I'll be fucking myself over. But I'm afraid if I marry him, I'll be miserable. It's some stupid shit I need to figure out soon. If he got a decent job and I was no longer supporting him, I'd feel a million times better. And marriage would be a definite conversation topic.
You HAVE to leave him. If you are questioning it now, it WILL NOT get better.

I’m going to be a little harsh, but this is what I had to tell myself in order to break up with my ex of 4 years who was desperately in love with me:

“Grow a pair you fucking pussy. You know you’re not happy. You deserve to be happy. And he will be happier with someone that loves him as much as he loves them. Shit or get off the pot. And then go have yourself that 3 way with a hot chick that you have always wanted!!!!!!”

AND SCENE!
 

ZaraBeth420

Well-Known Member
I agree with Yessie. It seems you need to be free from this guy, for yourself, to see what it's like.

And for him, so he knows the truth.

And if it was meant to be, you'll eventually come running back together.
 

curious2garden

Well-Known Mod
Staff member
BGE I've seen your pics you are beautiful.

I blew my hair when I went off opiates in 2013. I only thinned and then really looked like an old crone. You know the old witch with three stringy hairs. I can't tell you how many times I had the clippers in my hand and was getting ready to lay waste to the left overs. My hair was well below my butt and I finally chopped off what was left, no not bald, mine is coming back so I was very lucky. Therefore take my advice with a grain of salt.

My advice will be really hard to do. Wear wigs at work but all other times get rid of them. Simply ignore people. I would not be above some tattoos on my head either. Why the fuck not? Try painting them on to be sure first LOL. Your bone structure is classic. You are not used to seeing yourself without hair so go for it and get used to it then decide.

As for your long term disappointment called a boyfriend think about being 60 with him with far fewer options than you have now. Decide based on that. You'll be surprised how much positive feedback you'll get once get used to yourself without hair. Things will change inside you and hopefully your relationship will follow suit.

Sorry you have to go through this, life blows hard, hugs,
Annie
 

Gary Goodson

Well-Known Member
BGE I've seen your pics you are beautiful.

I blew my hair when I went off opiates in 2013. I only thinned and then really looked like an old crone. You know the old witch with three stringy hairs. I can't tell you how many times I had the clippers in my hand and was getting ready to lay waste to the left overs. My hair was well below my butt and I finally chopped off what was left, no not bald, mine is coming back so I was very lucky. Therefore take my advice with a grain of salt.

My advice will be really hard to do. Wear wigs at work but all other times get rid of them. Simply ignore people. I would not be above some tattoos on my head either. Why the fuck not? Try painting them on to be sure first LOL. Your bone structure is classic. You are not used to seeing yourself without hair so go for it and get used to it then decide.

As for your long term disappointment called a boyfriend think about being 60 with him with far fewer options than you have now. Decide based on that. You'll be surprised how much positive feedback you'll get once get used to yourself without hair. Things will change inside you and hopefully your relationship will follow suit.

Sorry you have to go through this, life blows hard, hugs,
Annie
:hug:
 

neosapien

Well-Known Member
Sorry that you're going through such a thing at such a young age. With that being said, I'd totally fuck a bald chick. The general consensus among those of us that have seen you, is that you were pretty hot with hair. You're probably still hot without hair. You just don't think so. And therein lies the problem. My advice is to fucking OWN it. It's a part of you now. Go to conventions, make contacts, lead the march of science and medicine. Get busy living, or get busy dying. Good luck Bygon. PS a nude, bald pic of you on them horses you love never hurt anyone.
 

Yessica...

Well-Known Member
BGE I've seen your pics you are beautiful.

I blew my hair when I went off opiates in 2013. I only thinned and then really looked like an old crone. You know the old witch with three stringy hairs. I can't tell you how many times I had the clippers in my hand and was getting ready to lay waste to the left overs. My hair was well below my butt and I finally chopped off what was left, no not bald, mine is coming back so I was very lucky. Therefore take my advice with a grain of salt.

My advice will be really hard to do. Wear wigs at work but all other times get rid of them. Simply ignore people. I would not be above some tattoos on my head either. Why the fuck not? Try painting them on to be sure first LOL. Your bone structure is classic. You are not used to seeing yourself without hair so go for it and get used to it then decide.

As for your long term disappointment called a boyfriend think about being 60 with him with far fewer options than you have now. Decide based on that. You'll be surprised how much positive feedback you'll get once get used to yourself without hair. Things will change inside you and hopefully your relationship will follow suit.

Sorry you have to go through this, life blows hard, hugs,
Annie
I love you!

EDIT: you give the best advice! And online hugs!
 
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