Nothing Even Matters Anymore?

I just toked, because I was in a bad mood, and I am not even happy at all.. I really am down today.. So I'm gonna vent before I gotta go to the doctors..
I hate everything. There is no point in trying for anything.. You can pretty much do as little as possible and get away with it everytime.. If it was the other way around like it used to be, I still would be the same.. I'm not going to say I'm smart or dumb, because I really don't know, but I have made just barely passing grades my entire life, and I got in trouble all the time with grades from my parents, but I never REALLY cared.. There was ALWAYS more interesting things to do.. I'm still that way even though they gave me ADD meds, and this concerta is what works best, but the help is just a little.. I know it won't fix everything, but we tested and tested different meds for years on and off, and this one works best. I realize I eed to put fourth effort to go anywhere, but its too late now anyways, I already got through college, and now I am livivng with my friend in an apartment.. I feel like this IS the happiest I can be, because honestly it really is even though I am miserable most of the time.. All I ever wanted was to live in an apartment not mowing my lawn, and just chlling with a good friend.. I have it great! Yet, I hate it.. There really is NOTHING better anways in my opinion.. I hate working, its no mental block, I have tried everything, just my effort won't increase ever. I try and try.. But I really don't want to be more succesful anyways because I like where I am at, that pisses me off too, because I am a complete bum, hardly get out of my pajamas, have everything I want, being a chef but I still just hate every second of some days.. Just knowing that to me there is nothing better than this miserable hell hole, is just depressing.. I have never had one bit of motivation to anything, my views were always to barely get by.. And I am not stressed by that, I am stressed by just peoples bullshit, and stubbing my toe.. Those things used to not matter, now whenever something like that happens I am fucked in my happiness until I toke or the next day.. And now even toking isn't helping.. -.-

fml

Lol sorry guys bored.. But seriously, this sucks.

Don't do it, you have too much to live for.

sounds to me like your just real lazy, go out and do stuff! if you need motivation how about not living the life you are now since you hate it.
not trying to be a dick, just saying what I think after reading

Everyone feels like that in someway. Y do u think rich ppl and celebs always get caught doin dumb shit... We r ALL crazy! if i were u id smoke more. sound like u need a girl. Not a trouble maker but one that can roll ya blunts and check on ya plants lol. Hope things get better for ya

But a girl can either make you happy as hell or F*&$ YOU OVER
dont trust all too quick lol(sorry im pissed off at the moment too hahah)

Dude, I feel like that alot. I was supposed to clean the dog shit in the back yard over 2 months ago. Its really call it laziness. You are where you are, because you are.

sagensour said:

<SNIP> You are where you are, because you are.<SNIP>

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What is .... is

tacos are... because.

get off all those meds for one just a word of advice. Most doctors don't know their ass from a hole in the ground and I honestly would not be surprised if that was help leading to your lack of motivation and depression. Do you really know what the drugs are doing that they give you, have you researched them, have you looked at medical studies, have you discussed them with other medical professionals. It's just a word of advice they played that game with me for years and years, and I found out many of them didn't know a fucking thing. I asked them questions they would give me false information I got very annoyed because essentially they were giving out drugs with a lack of eduction on them. Their higher ups want them to throw the drugs so they are just the promoters. I suggest getting off them and seeing how you feel, maybe vaporizing, I feel better vaping but sometimes I like to just take a break to clear my head and wait a little while and then get high because it feels great to get that tolerance down and it's really amazing to do it again. Good luck man I was in a bad situation with my health they told me to just throw anti depressants and other drugs at it, only made the situation worse, until I found out what the real problem was. Go figure those fuckers are just big jokers with a white outfit on saying they are helping. I am not saying all docs are bad but I am saying that many are not nearly as educated as they should be and you should learn for yourself exactly what is going into your body.

j0ejoe100 said:

get off all those meds for one just a word of advice. Most doctors don't know their ass from a hole in the ground and I honestly would not be surprised if that was help leading to your lack of motivation and depression. Do you really know what the drugs are doing that they give you, have you researched them, have you looked at medical studies, have you discussed them with other medical professionals. It's just a word of advice they played that game with me for years and years, and I found out many of them didn't know a fucking thing. I asked them questions they would give me false information I got very annoyed because essentially they were giving out drugs with a lack of eduction on them. Their higher ups want them to throw the drugs so they are just the promoters. I suggest getting off them and seeing how you feel, maybe vaporizing, I feel better vaping but sometimes I like to just take a break to clear my head and wait a little while and then get high because it feels great to get that tolerance down and it's really amazing to do it again. Good luck man I was in a bad situation with my health they told me to just throw anti depressants and other drugs at it, only made the situation worse, until I found out what the real problem was. Go figure those fuckers are just big jokers with a white outfit on saying they are helping. I am not saying all docs are bad but I am saying that many are not nearly as educated as they should be and you should learn for yourself exactly what is going into your body.

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but bro, the side effects of weed IS his condition.

Behind every good man is a better woman.
My 3 rules to happiness:
1) Have something to do.
2) Have something to look forward to.
3) Have someone to love.
Oh yea, almost forgot the bonus rule. Have some good budz to smoke. Cheer up my friend. You could be locked up in a 4x4 cell for the rest of your life.

thats the only draw back from MJ in my opinion, laziness, i was like you, i have work one day a week, and sometimes i just didnt turn up, made bullshit excuses, i would just get baked, and bum around and go to work 1 day a week to get weed. Theres so much more to life.

Im still smoking weed, but i have the job oppurtunity off a life time tomorow and i intend to get it, and put my heart and sole to it. I thought i was the one that bad shit constantly happens to, and it still does alot, but just find something that makes you feel like life is worth living, its different for everyone, someone may need a life partner, another person may need a certain car. For me, its having shit loads of money and be able to go out, buy what i want, and also Save up for my skyline r33/r34 that i will some day have!


PEACE!

A good pure sativa would take the laziness away, trigger creativity and bring a euphoric frame of mind. Bob Marley is a prime example of that. One love

.........and if marijuana doesn't improve your quality of life, don't smoke it. I'm 35 and spent 13 years in the marine corp. I went to Iraq 4 times and Afghanistan once. I have PTSD. Along with it comes a variety of mental issues. I can say without a doubt that cannabis helps my life in every aspect. I have been perscribed every pill you can perscribe and they all seemed to make me worse as time went on. I no longer take anything. I found the strains that work for me.

cadeneli said:

.........and if marijuana doesn't improve your quality of life, don't smoke it. I'm 35 and spent 13 years in the marine corp. I went to Iraq 4 times and Afghanistan once. I have PTSD. Along with it comes a variety of mental issues. I can say without a doubt that cannabis helps my life in every aspect. I have been perscribed every pill you can perscribe and they all seemed to make me worse as time went on. I no longer take anything. I found the strains that work for me.

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But did you kill anyone?

let me put it this way. I saw combat.

Well guys, thanks.. But, the meds, they help, so does the weed, I can honestly say that I am happy sometimes sober, with nostalgic feelings, or having sober times with friends, then just the fact of knowing you are doing something fun, sober, makes you happy.. The meds, they make me happy, but only when I take a lot, and I am sure as hell the doc won't up my dosage to as much as I need.. The only things that motivate me are drugs, music, and art. I suck at art, and am too shy to play my guitar in front of people.. Art being drawing pictures..

But I honestly don't think there IS anything that can fix my laziness, 'I' can't even do it.. Thats the only answer to my problem and its still wrong.. Like I said, I have tried my ass off my whole life to not be lazy, made straight A's once, but even feeling THAT acomplishment, I was miserable doing the homework, and figured that if I had to be succesful I would be more pissed all the time than I already am..

I wish I was old =/

let me put it this way. I saw combat.

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Really dude, I can't even imagine how that must be, I mean I couldn't go out and kill people non stop all day.. Lol if thats even what you did, in that case, weed WOULD be the ONLY answer anyways haha

words from my dad....suck it up and bare down son!

cadeneli said:

let me put it this way. I saw combat.

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But did you kill anybody?