Hello, I've always suffered from depression but lately it has gone over the top due to problems with my girlfriend etc. I just can't feel positive anymore and have suicide thoughts. By the way, my depression is chronic and over the years it was much better and I haven't taken anti-depressants in almost 10 years and I have been smoking week recreationally about 2 times per week since 2 years ago, I haven't really use it to treat depression per se but I know that if I smoke it I feel high and positive. If I smoke sativa, I know I will be positive, although with my current problems I don't know if it would turn into anxiety and cause me more problems, plus I would have to vaporize ever day and then my tolerance would skyrocket. On the other hand, I have taken antidepressants before, I think the longer I did was 6 months, I know I can't feel anything, I can't feel happy nor sad if I take them, I would be just neutral and yes, my wiener starts feeling like jelly and have 0 libido which really sucks and I don't know if it would affect my libido on the long term which is already on the lower end of the normal range. At the same time, I don't think I will date or have sex in a while due to my depression so technically, sex will not be a problem during this time. What would you do?