So I got a new vacuum yesterday.

It's a Shark or something or other. It has massive suction, and often sucks the rug right into its shit it's so powerful. I have to have someone hold down the rug while it sucks on it.

Should I try to shove my cock in it? It looks super pleasurable but I'm worried it may get stuck or suck the skin off of it and that would be hard to explain to the old lady.

Make sure you lube it up good first and start with the lowest setting for safety reasons.

clear compartment is nifty so in case you suck something incorrect you'll be able to look at it. hey-look that's my watch up in thar, or oh hey there's a squirrel, I see my bratwurst.

I just picked my nose and suddenly remembered that I cut up some chili earlier and picked it up with my fingers. ow

The misses loves hers too.

Make sure you keep your hand near the off switch. I'd fill up the bagless tank with ice just in case it sucks your weiner off. That way you can just take the thing with you to the hospital.

I have a Shark too. It's never once occurred to me to put my cock in it though. Brb.

LetsGetCritical said:

I just picked my nose and suddenly remembered that I cut up some chili earlier and picked it up with my fingers. ow

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I feel your pain but atleast you didn't try to rub one out or touch your eyes.

hempyninja309 said:

I feel your pain but atleast you didn't try to rub one out or touch your eyes.

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done both plenty of times since I started growing superhots. the habanero is soft by comparison

neosapien said:

I have a Shark too. It's never once occurred to me to put my cock in it though. Brb.

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The question is "why not?". Everyday I see at least one thing that I wonder if I can put my cock in it.

hempyninja309 said:

I feel your pain but atleast you didn't try to rub one out or touch your eyes.

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Me and the ole lady had an accident and some muscle rub, involving our nether regions.

whitebb2727 said:

Me and the ole lady had an accident and some muscle rub, involving our nether regions.

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I would have filled a bowl up with milk soaked my genitals in it and then left it outside for my neighbors cat.

You ok bu$hy? Did it detach your peen, or suck your balls flat?

No man and I mean no man has ever operated a vacum cleaner and not thought of sticking his cock into the suction hose.......if you say otherwise you're lying.!
Where the fuck is See4 ? That's exactly the reason the pocket pussy was invented but he's the resident expert on pocket pussy's so he'd know for sure !

Hey! That gave me a great money making idea! I'll invent a pocket pussy that has a vacuum cleaner attachment on the back.

Any investors out there?

whitebb2727 said:

Me and the ole lady had an accident and some muscle rub, involving our nether regions.

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A bunch of us went skiing one year and one of the guys was putting hand cream on his nuts so they wouldn't stick. Well my buddies little brother, who's like 22 at the time and a little , picks up the Icy/Hot container and asks if that's what he was using..."Yup"..the guy says.. a minute later the kid came screaming, naked, through the house and dove balls first into the snow...I don't ever remember laughing so hard.

bu$hleaguer said:

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It's a Shark or something or other. It has massive suction, and often sucks the rug right into its shit it's so powerful. I have to have someone hold down the rug while it sucks on it.

Should I try to shove my cock in it? It looks super pleasurable but I'm worried it may get stuck or suck the skin off of it and that would be hard to explain to the old lady.

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If you do, don't use the hose..stick it right in the head and turn on the brush..it's like a pulsating massage...