Upcoming drug test

dtl420

dtl420

Well-Known Member
vertnugs said:
Steal a $3 item??

If he has to steal a $3 drug test kit how the fuck ya gonna afford all that other shit??


Hell fuck the test.......your employment opps just got shot to shit for having theft on your record!

Humans are funny creatures
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I'd love to know where you have found a 3 dollar drug test in store.. maybe if you searched ebay, but even walmart's cheapest test in store where I'm at is 15-20$. when a guy is unemployed that's a decent amount of money..
 
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Gorillaglue4u

Well-Known Member
Didn't read but the first page before skipping to the end. Man you guys know how to give a warm welcome lol.
However not sure if it's been mentioned or not but I always use AGENT X synthetic. Just used it like 3 months ago again that's my 6th time using it. Only time I failed was when the bottle was not warm enough. Wish you luck on your new job.
 
MichiganMedGrower

MichiganMedGrower

Well-Known Member
dtl420 said:
Omg, some interesting suggestions here..

I was on probation for 2 years and smoked on and off the whole time while having to pass supervised piss tests.

thc is fat soluble, so you need to do everything in your power to burn fat. That means low fat high fiber diet, plenty of water (not because it's going to "flush" you out, but because your metabolism will operate better when you're fully hydrated). Jog a lot, and then jog some more. Cardiovascular exercise burns fat. Take a daily b vitamin supplement, this will also help your metabolism burn fat.

Don't waste any time, it's not on your side here. I used to give myself 2 weeks to get clean and would jog every day, or jump rope, or anything to elevate my heart rate for as long as possible.

a day or 2 before the test buy a drug test at walmart (or steal one if you REALLY can't afford one) and test yourself. It's not likely that this employer is going to invest much money into a sophisticated drug test. If you fail you have a few more options;

1. Really try to find someone with clean pee. Think of anyone you can. Do any of your friends have a significant other that doesn't smoke? No matter what anyone tells you, it doesn't matter if its from a girl or boy. Even if you're a dude and you get piss from a pregnant chick, it doesn't matter, as long as the piss is clean and as fresh as possible. If you have to store it for more than a few hours put it in the fridge and reheat it on your defroster in a condom on your way to the test. It needs to be between 90-100f or you'll fail. This is easily achievable if you hold the condom to your wrist, it shouldn't feel cool or hot but ambient against your skin. Make sure you're wearing baggy pants and safety pin the condom to your underwear above the knot you tied (condoms are pretty damn flexible so don't worry about it breaking, I've done it a million times it wont break). Pinned to your underwear against your inner thigh, any small temperature variation above or below 90-100f will stabilize to your body temp as arteries flow a lot of blood through your thigh, making it the best place for the condom.

2. Fake piss if you can find it in store. follow the same instructions as real piss

3. Sure jell from walmart (with the canning/jarring supplies). As cannabinoids metabolize out of your body they go through your intestines, where the walls of your intestines absorb the metaboloids into your blood stream where they are filtered out and eventually make their way into your blader/piss. Sure jell literally coats your intestines for a short time stopping the absorption of the metaboloids and allowing you a couple of clean pisses. But this method causes you do piss pretty much pure water with no color. take a b vitamin with the sure jell and it will turn your piss BRIGHT yellow, it'll look like you haven't had a sip of water. Google the instructions, I haven't had to use this method in a long time, so the amount of time before the test and how long you stay clean elude me.

You CAN pass this test. It's just a matter of how badly you want to. And please don't drink any bleach, ammonia, or piss..........
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These things will still only pass piss tests randomly.

Also. People with high metabolism may be able to burn excess fat in time and pee clean enough. (Still up to luck) but if you are a lower metabolism person and you excercise the weeks before a test as a regular user and you will likely burn some fat and release the stored thc much slower right through the test time possibly.
 
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ChopoDio

New Member
MichiganMedGrower said:
These things will still only pass piss tests randomly.

Also. People with high metabolism may be able to burn excess fat in time and pee clean enough. (Still up to luck) but if you are a lower metabolism person and you excercise the weeks before a test as a regular user and you will likely burn some fat and release the stored thc much slower right through the test time possibly.
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I have a extremely fast metabolism, I can’t gain a pound. I’m 5’9 been 125 lbs all my adult life I’m 33 years old now
 
farmerfischer

farmerfischer

Well-Known Member
Metasynth said:
It was a lab test for court
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the businesses here in northern Mi..( well most) are lab screening even if they have you drop in a cup chances are some will be lab'd.. ever scence med mj.. probably get worse in time . a lot of businesses are not pro pot here and lab.. regardless of making you think all you were doing is peeing In a cup.. abit paranoid but sadly true..
 
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vertnugs

Well-Known Member
ChopoDio said:
I’m still coming up positive on the Home drug tests though.
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You get more than 1?

Drink a gallon or 2 of water over the next 2 hours.....piss all that shit out.Drink a glass of water....you should have to piss within minutes.Is it pretty much water comin out?yep....recheck with a kit...bet it won't have thc in it.
 
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thenotsoesoteric

thenotsoesoteric

Well-Known Member
ChopoDio said:
hey guys,
I have a upcoming urine drug test I have to take on 1/2/18 it’s a pre employment one. I am a little concerned I might fail. I quit smoking on on 12/22 I use to smoke a couple grams a day give or take. I want to know what I can do to pass besides drinking a lot of water? I dont want to dilute it when I go there and I have no friends to use for clean urine. I have been only drinking water as of today, the last 3 day I was drinking cranberry juice. I also brought a product called “pure flush total body cleanser” I got from my local head shop I plan on taking a couple hours before. I just wanted to know what the chances of me passing after doing all of this? I’m 5’9 around 125-130 lbs male. If someone could respond to this ASAP and provide some advice that I can do to guarantee me passing that I may have left out I would greatly appreciate it. I diffently need this job!
Thanks in advance.
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I weighed about the same as you but am 6'1" and back in 2006 I quit smoking for about 2 weeks, I worked out 6 times a week including 30-40 minutes of jogging a day, and I ended up buying some cleanse drink and passed my piss test. But that was 2006 so I'm pretty sure the new test are more scrutinizing this days. But if you've been hardcore sweating every day and drinking a gallon of water a day I'd say you have a slim chance.

Also, if it is a cheap drug test they use you can just use one of those detox drinks but if it is going out to a lab you're boned.
 
MichiganMedGrower

MichiganMedGrower

Well-Known Member
ChopoDio said:
I have a extremely fast metabolism, I can’t gain a pound. I’m 5’9 been 125 lbs all my adult life I’m 33 years old now
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I know you want to hear you will be ok. But there is no guarantee of pissing clean with your own urine except for time.

When I was 17 I went to rehab. I pissed thc for 71 day’s.

And that was tested with test strips from the 80’s.

Good luck I hope you do ok. Try to get clean pee and keep it warm as you instructed in this thread is the only safe advice.

Mrs. MMG has to be tested for her career and always uses a friends clean pee.

Last time I was tested was 14 years ago but I waited 6 weeks and did not smoke but failed anyway. I am in pretty good shape. I was snowboarding every week back then.

Sorry to be the one with the honest bad news.
 
farmerfischer

farmerfischer

Well-Known Member
vertnugs said:
You get more than 1?

Drink a gallon or 2 of water over the next 2 hours.....piss all that shit out.Drink a glass of water....you should have to piss within minutes.Is it pretty much water comin out?yep....recheck with a kit...bet it won't have thc in it.
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b12 keeps it yellow..
 
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