I have struggled with MDD, SAD and GAD my adult life, I like you have also tried more or less every drug they offer to treat these conditions.
I am not 'selling' anything, I am telling you, a person who clearly does not and has not ever had an anxiety condition (because you said took methylphenidate, adderal, concerta, bupropion and other AMPHETEMINES!!!!!) that there are very few options to treat these anxiety conditions. These drugs don't treat anxiety disorders (in fact they are contraindicatory).
Cannabis is certainly one of the worse options for these real clinical anxiety disorders, the amount of anxiety and paranoia that cannabis ADDS to my already anxious state it doesn't help.
I too have been messed up in ways I very much regret, esp. with these benzos, you are not alone in that. And that is why I have been saying over and over to be very careful with the use of benzos ... but also that for these conditions for which there are no other effective treatments some of these benzos are the only thing that we have and using them responsibly (don't take them everyday or all the time, only when you're about to have a panic attack etc.) can improve our lives.
We seem to have many of the same past experiences yet you seem to act like you think you are better then me or that that even matters, I don't get it.
I don’t get being on a cannabis form/post and pushing benzos or any pill. The farther you get from nature, the worse off you are.
You are right those pills didn’t help, and anphetamines are counter productive. So why did the government schools tell my parents and push my parents for me to be on them, why did the doctors lie and say they would help, and why did BigPharma lie? Why did they fuck up my childhood?
Personally I hate pill pushing.
If I went to a doctor and they said, “you are die, but if you take this pill you will live”
First off I wouldn’t believe them, because they lie for money.
Second, I would be inclined to think I am not die but will be if I take the pill, because they lie and keep you sick to make money.
Thirdly: I would reapond. “Shove it up your ass and go fuck yourslef.”
I’d rather die than support Greedy Narcissistic Psychopaths of BigPharma or the doctors helping them kill everyone slowly.
In my humble opinion
Also in my opinion if you think pills help more than cannabis for ADHD autism Social Anxiety or whatever else.
I say you don’t smoke cannabis, or don’t have anxiety.
I am better than know one.
Hope the Best. Much Love