it's possible to be an honest person who sometimes utters falsehoods. no one is 100% honest. we're hardwired to look out for #1 and creating our own reality to project to the outside world is an exercise in self-preservation. sometimes it conflicts with our need for community. i guess we're supposed to strike some kind of balance. i don't have the ability/desire to strike that balance so i spend a lot of time alone.
i know a guy who will tell a chick she looks fat if she asks. he believes the act of asking a question specifically to fish for a certain answer is in itself "dishonest" and to play along with the rouse would make him a tool. ironically he is kind of a tool but his thinking is spot on. people act like they want the truth but all they really want is to feel fuzzy inside. the truth has a knack for leaving an uncomfortable feeling in the gut of the recipient, and the lie makes the presenter feel like crap. so which option is more selfless? hell if i know.