How to run for congress

tightpockt

Well-Known Member
How would someone like me with no political. experience and no money run for and win a congress seat?
 

MidwesternGro

Well-Known Member
Hate minorities, yell absurdities at a camera, consider women second class, start wearing teabags on your hat, try to force other people to live by Biblical laws and move to Texas.

This only works if you have pale skin.
 

tightpockt

Well-Known Member
BigNBushy said:
Whore yourself out to the largest industry in your district.
How are grass roots campaigns started? How do you get people to volunteer for you? Im just curious how the whole process runs.
 

GOD HERE

Well-Known Member
How would someone like me with no political. experience and no money run for and win a congress seat?
First step, attend a Tea Bagger rally, get angry for all the wrong reasons, and a few racial epithets are a must. At that point, some business asshole will finance your campaign.

No more steps after that.
 

tightpockt

Well-Known Member
I think I'm going to try my hand at running for City Council first.
I think I would have a pretty good shot. The people running the show now are total morons.
 

NoDrama

Well-Known Member
Hate minorities, yell absurdities at a camera, consider women second class, start wearing teabags on your hat, try to force other people to live by Biblical laws and move to Texas.

This only works if you have pale skin.
I haven't seen too many people like that in Congress, have you?
 

Blindnslow

Well-Known Member
If you can convince 54% of the people your telling the truth, when your really lying 98% of the time. You'll do great!!!
 

desert dude

Well-Known Member
How would someone like me with no political. experience and no money run for and win a congress seat?
Buy a good pair of sturdy shoes and a couple of cheap suits. Go to places in your district and shake hands with people, and tell them you are running and want their support. Pick out an issue important to your district and pander like hell over that issue. Go door to door and knock and beg for votes. Have a thick skin. Be prepared to lose the first time or two.
 

NoDrama

Well-Known Member
Pay attention. The question was "How to run for congress."

I just gave him some advice from the teabagger handbook.

Coca-Cola’s ‘America the Beautiful’ Super Bowl Ad Causes Idiotic Tea Party Backlash
So does that work? I haven't seen anyone in Congress win a seat using any of your ideas, in fact i think those ideas are really a way to ensure you won't get elected. You should try helping instead. I wouldn't call it advice, more like shit you can do to look stupid.
 

desert dude

Well-Known Member
So does that work? I haven't seen anyone in Congress win a seat using any of your ideas, in fact i think those ideas are really a way to ensure you won't get elected. You should try helping instead. I wouldn't call it advice, more like shit you can do to look stupid.
Like most low intelligence progressives, MidWGro suffers from TEA party derangement syndrome. It is a mental illness characterized by conflation of economic sanity with racism.
 

AlecTheGardener

Well-Known Member
How would someone like me with no political. experience and no money run for and win a congress seat?
Good luck. It seems that many politicians start with a small dream and end up inevitably corrupted by our pay to win democratic republic. The only way regular "Joe American" can get into a political seat above Village Wishing Well Secretary is with money, who has money? Lobbyist and special interest PACs/super wealthy. Send a choirboy to congress and four years later they return twisted and unattached from their constituents.

Downright upsetting.
 
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