Im reaching out here, HELP! *real shit*

So after running into some life roadblocks, im half tempted to take what i have left, sell it, combine it with my tax returns and get a bus ticket to anywhere that someones willing to lend a hand. A couple weeks ago i made a bit of a mistake, i lost my cool at work with some 19yo punk and put him in his place. It took 4 months of harassing and bullshit before he caught me on a day that i had just been dealing with entirely to much and lost it. Ive done some prison time(for growing,tax stamp,intent, and an assault, all one incident) im not going to be treated like shit, ive learned to hold my own. With that being said, i learned a great deal of respect and how to handle others and how to live in peace side by side all from in there. It takes alot for me to lose it like this.

So with that being said, let me tell you about myself. Im in my mid 20's, ive been around here for quite some time. The cannabis industry is where i want to be someday. I am 97% ready to start glassblowing, by that i mean i have everything but a place to set up and someone i can slave under to learn what i need. Im a certified welder and fabricator, im damn good at what i do. I also have certain machine experience. Im a very fast learner and will adopt easily.

Lets get some of my biggest problems out there on the table as well. Im a felon. And im an addict in recovery. This is where i need someone the biggest in my life, some support, a sponsor, someone i can trust. Lets talk about my addiction. Its been on and off now for 10 years. Opiates. I have a handful of pins and screws in my spine after having a tumor live inside me from birth to 16. It actually ate away at parts of my spine. I deal with ALOT of physical pain, which can also lead to mental pain and a feeling of helplessness. I hurt. But ive found with the new concentrates im more than able to perform like anyone else for 8-10 hours a day before i have to call it and medicate. My problem with this is i live in a non-medical state. I believe i can topple this addiction if i could just get my medical card or find a state to live in with rec use. My other issues, i just dont have any body, my Pops, thats it. A few friends, but none i can call on for what im trying to get at here.

With all this out there, im asking for help from the RIU family. Im down on my luck. Finding a job around here is near impossible, deeres being a big part our little towns survival, just let off 500 people, we all do the same work but their app looks better than mine. Im looking for any leads i can get. Whether thats from welders, growers, glassblowers, or all of the above. If you know someone whos looking for a hard worker or you have a garage i can sleep in/rent or anything, please let me know. I dont have much. I could have a few grand and bus ticket in no time. Ill do video chats with anyone, i can send my resume out to places as well. I dont know what else to do here folks, so im reaching out everywhere i know

Thanks for your time.

torturekiller420 said:

So after running into some life roadblocks, im half tempted to take what i have left, sell it, combine it with my tax returns and get a bus ticket to anywhere that someones willing to lend a hand. A couple weeks ago i made a bit of a mistake, i lost my cool at work with some 19yo punk and put him in his place. It took 4 months of harassing and bullshit before he caught me on a day that i had just been dealing with entirely to much and lost it. Ive done some prison time(for growing,tax stamp,intent, and an assault, all one incident) im not going to be treated like shit, ive learned to hold my own. With that being said, i learned a great deal of respect and how to handle others and how to live in peace side by side all from in there. It takes alot for me to lose it like this.

So with that being said, let me tell you about myself. Im in my mid 20's, ive been around here for quite some time. The cannabis industry is where i want to be someday. I am 97% ready to start glassblowing, by that i mean i have everything but a place to set up and someone i can slave under to learn what i need. Im a certified welder and fabricator, im damn good at what i do. I also have certain machine experience. Im a very fast learner and will adopt easily.

Lets get some of my biggest problems out there on the table as well. Im a felon. And im an addict in recovery. This is where i need someone the biggest in my life, some support, a sponsor, someone i can trust. Lets talk about my addiction. Its been on and off now for 10 years. Opiates. I have a handful of pins and screws in my spine after having a tumor live inside me from birth to 16. It actually ate away at parts of my spine. I deal with ALOT of physical pain, which can also lead to mental pain and a feeling of helplessness. I hurt. But ive found with the new concentrates im more than able to perform like anyone else for 8-10 hours a day before i have to call it and medicate. My problem with this is i live in a non-medical state. I believe i can topple this addiction if i could just get my medical card or find a state to live in with rec use. My other issues, i just dont have any body, my Pops, thats it. A few friends, but none i can call on for what im trying to get at here.

With all this out there, im asking for help from the RIU family. Im down on my luck. Finding a job around here is near impossible, deeres being a big part our little towns survival, just let off 500 people, we all do the same work but their app looks better than mine. Im looking for any leads i can get. Whether thats from welders, growers, glassblowers, or all of the above. If you know someone whos looking for a hard worker or you have a garage i can sleep in/rent or anything, please let me know. I dont have much. I could have a few grand and bus ticket in no time. Ill do video chats with anyone, i can send my resume out to places as well. I dont know what else to do here folks, so im reaching out everywhere i know

Thanks for your time.

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That's rough, brother. If you can make it out to Cali in the valley, I can probably get you some welding work. We do custom building work, and my boss is a really down to earth guy, and I may be able to work something out. Maybe we could talk about bit more in PM about your welding experience. You would have to have some kind of background because there are a shrinking number of jobs available for self-taught or on-the-job trained welders. Most employers consider only trained and experienced welders for their project teams. A large number of projects required welders who are not only trained, but who have also passed professional certification testing. This means in a nut shell that you should find your self a good vocational school or something like that. IDK. Gimme a shout if you're interested. And, try and keep your chin up if otherwise. There's work out there, and I'm sure if you stay as passionate as you sound, that you'll find some. Best of luck.

Ok ...... Do you find your anger to be the foundation for your troubles ?

I can think of 3 times that ive lost my cool, thats it. and it seems like every time i lose alot more with it. I'm definately not an angry person, 2 of the 3 times ive lost it, i feel anyone in my spot would of done the same. Also, i never really feel like myself mentally when im having to use opiates for my pain as opposed to concentrates. That would account for 2 of the first 3 incidents right there. Its hard to explain what those killers do to the brain and how one handles stuff while on em or going without em.

Damn ..that's exactly how I've been feeling lately (not much work, feeling in the dumps etc)
Wherever your journey takes you,i hope things work out better!still lots of good people out there ...
Sorry I'm not much help, but your certainly not alone!

torturekiller420 said:

I can think of 3 times that ive lost my cool, thats it. and it seems like every time i lose alot more with it. I'm definately not an angry person, 2 of the 3 times ive lost it, i feel anyone in my spot would of done the same. Also, i never really feel like myself mentally when im having to use opiates for my pain as opposed to concentrates. That would account for 2 of the first 3 incidents right there. Its hard to explain what those killers do to the brain and how one handles stuff while on em or going without em.

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pain and anger go hand in hand ..... Sorry to say

my dads got cripling osteoarthritis........ But he doesn't understand the real reason why he gets angry ....... Not good !!

dux said:

Damn ..that's exactly how I've been feeling lately (not much work, feeling in the dumps etc)
Wherever your journey takes you,i hope things work out better!still lots of good people out there ...
Sorry I'm not much help, but your certainly not alone!

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Just replying helps man.

i got up one morning , no money , no job , heavily addicted to herion , and at a total loss .

i got a bucket a spounge and some washing up liquid and started washing peoples cars door to door ........... Happy days lots of money lots of herion and 100 customers later

shit can happen and then shit can happen ........ Ignore societies rules and you'll survive .... Or even flurish


sometimes its best to just start again if society has failed you

U likely clam down more as U age...early to mid 20's is the worst time, IMO..20 years from now, U will still be temped to lose it but U will think more quickly all what might happen and stop yourself..maybe in 10 years but it times time, a long time to "grow up'' been there to know

Skylor said:

U likely clam down more as U age...early to mid 20's is the worst time, IMO..20 years from now, U will still be temped to lose it but U will think more quickly all what might happen and stop yourself..maybe in 10 years but it times time, a long time to "grow up'' been there to know

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damn truth !!

Pinworm, I cant seem to PM at the moment. I used to build custom overhead cranes. Small ones and big ones, Upto 120ft Truss cranes. I dont have schooling. Instead i was trained hands-on by nothing but old school guys for my first couple years. Eventually i took the lead of this position but later had to leave after some back issues. And yes, in the second pic i welded my partners welder into the crane lol, I like to have fun too. We left it in there until we spliced in half and sent it off to paint. No harm done thoe.

tourturekiller420 what is your ONE main problem ?

its sometimes easier to deal with the roots than the foliage.... If that makes sense

And im certified in couple types of mig. including .045 fluxcore, 3g. Thats the 1inch vertical up test. All of this through AWS

My one main problem. I guess here anymore, i just feel alone and like im not going anywhere. Like im stuck in life at the moment.

torturekiller420 said:

And im certified in couple types of mig. including .045 fluxcore, 3g. Thats the 1inch vertical up test. All of this through AWS

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That's actually pretty outstanding, brother. I'm going to shoot you my email addy, and if you find yourself out west. Feel free to contact me.

You might want to reconsider your screen name. Asking a lot for somebody to go out on a limb for somebody with it. Even if it is meant in jest.

I dont feel comfortable talking with friends, because i dont want to dump my problems on them, and they have no clue ive been dealing with these problems. I dont have any family to turn to but my dad, but that gets old, trust me. Hes old fashioned, he will never come around to the pot industry and wanting to blow glass for a living, ect. I feel alone in the world, I need a good friend, someone i can turn to. Someone i dont know either, someone i didnt grow up around. Someone i can trust. Im loyal, im not a thief, and i dont forget those that have helped.

Unclebaldrick said:

You might want to reconsider your screen name. Asking a lot for somebody to go out on a limb for somebody with it. Even if it is meant in jest.

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LOL, yea i hear ya, its a 6 feet under song, i think i had it on when i made this S/N years ago because i was in a pinch for some info. I would like to change it, is that possible?

torturekiller420 said:

LOL, yea i hear ya, its a 6 feet under song, i think i had it on when i made this S/N years ago because i was in a pinch for some info. I would like to change it, is that possible?

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No, I totally understand why you would pick it. I dont think you can change it. It's just a different context now. Somebody will have an idea.

Sounds like you are cool with travel, but what region are you in?

Ask @sunni our lovely mod. Best of luck to you bro