Pseudonym
Well-Known Member
So my girl and I were talking tonight over dinner about this guy who likes her and how he doesn't understand that she doesn't want anything to do with him despite her clearly indicating so and she brought up Ladder Theory. I've heard of it and remembered a lot of it from when I read all about it years ago, but I was wondering what everyone here generally thinks of it.
I'd have to say just based on her situation Ladder Theory is dead on. She met this guy in a class through a group project and thought he would make a good friend. I've met the kid too and he's a nice enough guy, definitely someone I could see her wanting as a friend.
But then this is where Ladder Theory comes in: women have two ladders in which they classify people. One is the "Friend Ladder" and the other is the "Mate Ladder." There is no jumping between ladders ever, you're either a friend or a potential mate for a girl. But guys have a single ladder, being the "Mate Ladder." We supposedly automatically rank the women we meat based on how badly we want to get with them. There are no friends, only mates. So when this guy started making more audacious moves for her attention she was shocked and freaked out. He tried to sleep over at her place after working on the project once and she had to end up kicking him out.
Now she's sort of disappointed because she really thought he would have made a good friend, which is why she ended up agreeing with the premise of Ladder Theory. And now she can't even talk to him without being afraid of leading him on. She wanted nothing to do with this guy in any sort of sexual, boyfriend, or relationship way, but he saw it differently and didn't realize he was on the "Friend Ladder."
There's a pretty good article on Wikipedia about Ladder Theory, but I was wondering what everyone else thought too.
I'd have to say just based on her situation Ladder Theory is dead on. She met this guy in a class through a group project and thought he would make a good friend. I've met the kid too and he's a nice enough guy, definitely someone I could see her wanting as a friend.
But then this is where Ladder Theory comes in: women have two ladders in which they classify people. One is the "Friend Ladder" and the other is the "Mate Ladder." There is no jumping between ladders ever, you're either a friend or a potential mate for a girl. But guys have a single ladder, being the "Mate Ladder." We supposedly automatically rank the women we meat based on how badly we want to get with them. There are no friends, only mates. So when this guy started making more audacious moves for her attention she was shocked and freaked out. He tried to sleep over at her place after working on the project once and she had to end up kicking him out.
Now she's sort of disappointed because she really thought he would have made a good friend, which is why she ended up agreeing with the premise of Ladder Theory. And now she can't even talk to him without being afraid of leading him on. She wanted nothing to do with this guy in any sort of sexual, boyfriend, or relationship way, but he saw it differently and didn't realize he was on the "Friend Ladder."
There's a pretty good article on Wikipedia about Ladder Theory, but I was wondering what everyone else thought too.
and never matured.
