Rosey's Grow~~check out my plants!

[roseypeach]

Do tell.....

I'm just tired as hell of being the last thing a man thinks of. Fuck that! I'm a good person, I deserve someone who has been there done that but I'm worth it anyways...ya know???? why that mutherfucker had to call tongiht and ask for explanations...do I have to spell it out??? seriously???? I am miserable!!! you don't give a shit, you haven't in ages, you don't care if I am wanting to spend time with ya, you dn't give a fuck if I have feelings about something...wtf am I supposed to think or do? I'm 45 years old and tired as fuck of waiting on someone to fucking understand. I just want to live and let live ya know? I just want to be happy with someone who makes me happy instead of being drawn down in a pit of negativity waiting at the end of every fucking day. Am I wrong??????? I just want some postiviity in my life, some light at the end of the tunnel! I've done so much for so long that I just want to have a moment to my damn self. If that's selfish then I'm fuckin selfish. Oh fuckin well. I met someone who makes me feel special. Maybe thats wrong. Oh fucking well. That's life. I just want to be happy. For fucking once. In 45 years, just happy to be with who is important to me. Is that so wrong???

 

[~Dankster~420]

Do tell.....

Well, you've talked 2 me. You should know.

 

[roseypeach]

Well, you've talked 2 me. You should know.

remind me then because i guess right now I am not sure of anything anymore to be honest.
I'm just trying to live each day and make it through each one without diving off the deep end.
Its fucking hard as fuck...its been hard as fuck...but I don't say anything because I don't want
anyone to think Im weak...because I can be just as tough as the next person..

 

[~Dankster~420]

What did I tell you just the day b4 yesterday ?: there's NOT a damn thing wrong with feeling good about life! Nor wanting to better yourself. Not at all!! And if you feel your going to do better on your own, then you WILL! You don't have NO one to answer to but God. And that's a fact. Its hard to tie a "free spirited" person down. Cause remember, some aren't meant to be tied down..

I'm just tired as hell of being the last thing a man thinks of. Fuck that! I'm a good person, I deserve someone who has been there done that but I'm worth it anyways...ya know???? why that mutherfucker had to call tongiht and ask for explanations...do I have to spell it out??? seriously???? I am miserable!!! you don't give a shit, you haven't in ages, you don't care if I am wanting to spend time with ya, you dn't give a fuck if I have feelings about something...wtf am I supposed to think or do? I'm 45 years old and tired as fuck of waiting on someone to fucking understand. I just want to live and let live ya know? I just want to be happy with someone who makes me happy instead of being drawn down in a pit of negativity waiting at the end of every fucking day. Am I wrong??????? I just want some postiviity in my life, some light at the end of the tunnel! I've done so much for so long that I just want to have a moment to my damn self. If that's selfish then I'm fuckin selfish. Oh fuckin well. I met someone who makes me feel special. Maybe thats wrong. Oh fucking well. That's life. I just want to be happy. For fucking once. In 45 years, just happy to be with who is important to me. Is that so wrong???

 

[~Dankster~420]

remind me then because i guess right now I am not sure of anything anymore to be honest.
I'm just trying to live each day and make it through each one without diving off the deep end.
Its fucking hard as fuck...its been hard as fuck...but I don't say anything because I don't want
anyone to think Im weak...because I can be just as tough as the next person..

Well that's cool. I can leave you alone if that's what you want. ?: but this isn't the way you where talking 2 me the other day (Friday). So what's happened between then and now.?: something has had to.

 

[roseypeach]

yeah you told me that...but you aren't here...you have no idea the fuckin pain and bullshit that I have dealt with . And to tell him again today...not once but the fifth fucking time...I'm done! I can't handle the negativity anymore. I can't live like that anymore...he acts like he gets it but he fuckin doesn't. He has no fuckin clue. And you know what all I deal with. Other stuff....but I am just so tired Dank..tired of the pain and the bs..its all too much...I don't know what to do sometimes...living here with my bro and sis is really helping but then like tonight, I should be having a great night and instead, I'm dealing with this crap. Its too much sometimes. I can't handle all the pain and BS. I just want to run away to tell you the truth! Just run and not stop till I'm far far away! then maybe slowing down and trying to start over. Its fucking hard as hell. We've talked. You know. Its unfuckingbelievable at times. I am so glad I am here at my bros and not there anymore. Its toxic is what it is. Toxic as fuck. I am ready to close the chapter and try something new but I don't even know if that is possible really. I have no idea.

 

[roseypeach]

Well that's cool. I can leave you alone if that's what you want. ?: but this isn't the way you where talking 2 me the other day (Friday). So what's happened between then and now.?: something has had to.

that's not it goober! don't you understand? I'm just tired of being hurt, I've been hurt so much. So fuckin much. I don't want to open myself up again if it is just to be hurt again. That's all I'm saying. I just can't go through that again. that's what I'm saying...I can't go through being hurt again..that's it... no more pain...Peach can't deal with anymore pain..its making me numb...I'm afraid one day I won't feel a damn thing. That's all, nothing else...

 

[roseypeach]

I'll be back in a few minutes..gotta have a cigarette........................................................

 

[DANKSWAG]

Rosey,

I really don't know all the details, nor do I need to know. I hear you you've been cut deep and often and for too long believed for the best out of the situation. Sounds like you got screwed but being female does not make that exclusively your problem. I could go on about my pain, been there I think I have a little perspective, being human and in involved different relationships all my life.

So go ahead my dear VENT get it out, don't let it eat you though your too good of a person to let someone who as you say lives for no one but himself, to continue to ruin your day/life.

It will take some time but trust me cause I am in your age group actually your senior when I say its okay to be angry, it is what you do with it that determines if this makes your a more wiser about whom you invest your time talent and love into the future. Trust me I have invested as well only to learn the same as you there was no return on it whatsoever. You're still young and you'll come out the better down the road you have too you've got no other choice so JUST DO IT, move forward don't get brought down by past hurts. If you do you'll become bitter and won't trust anyone again ever.

Oh so tomorrow when you get up first thing you do is toke and listen to my friend...
His words always pick me up....

Here's to a better day tomorrow for today is done!

 

[roseypeach]

Rosey,

I really don't know all the details, nor do I need to know. I hear you you've been cut deep and often and for too long believed for the best out of the situation. Sounds like you got screwed but being female does not make that exclusively your problem. I could go on about my pain, been there I think I have a little perspective, being human and in involved different relationships all my life.

So go ahead my dear VENT get it out, don't let it eat you though your too good of a person to let someone who as you say lives for no one but himself, to continue to ruin your day/life.

It will take some time but trust me cause I am in your age group actually your senior when I say its okay to be angry, it is what you do with it that determines if this makes your a more wiser about whom you invest your time talent and love into the future. Trust me I have invested as well only to learn the same as you there was no return on it whatsoever. You're still young and you'll come out the better down the road you have too you've got no other choice so JUST DO IT, move forward don't get brought down by past hurts. If you do you'll become bitter and won't trust anyone again ever.

Oh so tomorrow when you get up first thing you do is toke and listen to my friend...
His words always pick me up....

Here's to a better day tomorrow for today is done!

Thanks for saying that Dankswag, it means a lot. I hope that you are right. I want to believe in the good of man kind.There is someone I believe in more than anything. I just don't know if they realize they are worth that much in God's eyes. I am a God fearing woman and I love without boundaries. I just want that love to be meant to be be. I am pretty sure it is...but only God knows

 

[DANKSWAG]

Thanks for saying that Dankswag, it means a lot. I hope that you are right. I want to believe in the good of man kind.There is someone I believe in more than anything. I just don't know if they realize they are worth that much in God's eyes. I am a God fearing woman and I love without boundaries. I just want that love to be meant to be be. I am pretty sure it is...but only God knows

Rosey,

As a God fearing woman goes, then these words you will cherish from Job..."Though He slay me, blessed be His name"

 

[Foothills]

You're gonna do just fine, Rosey. You can stear your ship to where ever you want to go. Best thing is, after you get there, you can drop the anchor or keep on moving. It's all up to you girl and I bet you get it all dialed in just fine !!

 

[roseypeach]

Well that's cool. I can leave you alone if that's what you want. ?: but this isn't the way you where talking 2 me the other day (Friday). So what's happened between then and now.?: something has had to.

.Did I say that? No absolutley not, of couserI want to talk to to you....just not sure what level? you let me know...beecause.......... I'm not a mindreader and I know what I want..which is you there I said it!!!!!! how about you?

 

[roseypeach]

Well that's cool. I can leave you alone if that's what you want. ?: but this isn't the way you where talking 2 me the other day (Friday). So what's happened between then and now.?: something has had to.

.sorry if this steps on your toes. I love you!!!!!!!!!!!! always!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[dlftmyers]

Here Rosey this Buds for you

 

[roseypeach]

Fuck men you say ?: all men isn't assholes.

Not what I meant at all babe...that's true, all men rae not assholes. just the ones that are

LOL I know you aren't one of them, but today hit me hard, the old man asked me straight up
a nd I told him straight up. I am tired of all the BS honestly. I need to find some peace in my
life. I need peace otherwise I may die of anxiety LMAO. Seriously though, I'm serious :__
kind of freakeed me out...I don'twant thath to be the last thing I onced to be once. O

 

[roseypeach]

too fuckin wasted to read it right now LMFAO but I'll check in tomorrow. Geeshsssssssssssssss.....what a fuckin night.....wish I was dreamin half of it at least.....UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH............. Sorry I am so out of it, just too much to deal with today. WAY TOO FUCKIN MUCh. Sorry ya'll. Please forgive me.....I'm trying real hard to rein things in but its tough considering where I am right now LOL
Hit me u ok?

 

[DANKSWAG]

speaking of forgiveness and everything else, we've got your back Rosey....

a little something to ponder:
“The Paradoxical Commandments

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.”
― Kent M. Keith, The Silent Revolution: Dynamic Leadership in the Student Council

 

[~Dankster~420]

You know, here isn't where we need 2 be talking about this. I've told you on the phone how I feel numerous times. And I don't know howcome now you'd be questioning anything that I've said to you. And no, you didn't say that. I was just going by what all you've said within the past hour or so. Look at it from my point of few, and I've looked at it from yours, and understand completely. Just thought that's where you was going with the "fuck men" saying. And not really talking all that much 2 me.

.Did I say that? No absolutley not, of couserI want to talk to to you....just not sure what level? you let me know...beecause.......... I'm not a mindreader and I know what I want..which is you there I said it!!!!!! how about you?

 

[~Dankster~420]

.sorry if this steps on your toes. I love you!!!!!!!!!!!! always!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why would that step on my toes ?: lol